Sometimes Weary

14 10 2012

One shouldn’t blog when weary; everything seems darker than it should and come morning-time, so often there is a new spring.  Having said that, beautiful things have been written about weariness and the kind of disillusionment one feels when tired in body or in soul.

Bilbo, in Tolkein’s “The Lord of the Rings” admitted, “I am old, Gandalf. I don’t look it, but I am beginning to feel it in my heart of hearts. Well-preserved indeed! Why, I feel all thin, sort of stretched, if you know what I mean: like butter that has been scraped over too much bread. That can’t be right. I need a change, or something.”

Like butter that has been scraped over too much bread. Isn’t that well said?

E.T.A. Hoffman wrote, “Let me ask you outright, gentle reader, if there have not been hours, indeed whole days and weeks of your life, during which all your usual activities were painfully repugnant, and everything you believed in and valued seemed foolish and worthless?”

Do you ever find yourself there? Dragging your feet around; accomplishing little or nothing and not even knowing what you would do if you did “set your mind to it”? Things you are normally excited about, even passionate about, are uninteresting or even sour to your taste just now and simple tasks feel mountainous for no apparent reason?

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote a poem about the weary leg of the journey;

 “With favoring winds, o’er sunlit seas,
We sailed for the Hesperides,
The land where golden apples grow;
But that, ah! that was long ago.

How far, since then, the ocean streams
Have swept us from that land of dreams,
That land of fiction and of truth,
The lost Atlantis of our youth!…”

What does one do when in a weary place?  Something opposite? This reminds me of a post I saw on Facebook yesterday:

 It was scientifically proven that only 5% of the worlds population can give a correct answer less than 1 minute. Say the opposite of these word.

1. Always.

2. Coming.

3. From.

4. Take.

5. Me.

6. Down.

I have no idea if this has been “scientifically proven” or not, but the point is, maybe only 5% of the people find it easy to do the opposite when in a weary place. The rest of us ask: where do you find renewed energy, purpose, vision, hope, and clarity? Sometimes you can just “dig deep” but what if the well is dry? What fills the well?

The writer in Psalm 42 struggled:

 Why, my soul, are you downcast?

Why so disturbed within me?

But then he says,

Put your hope in God,

for I will yet praise him,

my Savior and my God.

My soul is downcast within me;

therefore I will remember you…

Deep calls to deep

in the roar of your waterfalls;

all your waves and breakers

have swept over me.

By day the LORD directs his love,

at night his song is with me—

a prayer to the God of my life.

I don’t have much more to say then that. Sometimes we need refueling before there is much more to write, or say or do. Sometimes we need new perspective. Sometimes we need a good sleep or a good cry or a good meal; sometimes we need to get quiet before God and let him search our souls and we need to open ourselves up to His good words; then we can look at things again from a better vantage point.

— Teresa Klassen

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